Friday, May 12, 2006

The art of Listening

The Art of Listening

Well whenever my husband talks something important with me I always annoy him by interrupting in between , well I am not a good listener he says, so I just tried to be one by analysing all about being a good listener, hey hope it would help you too to become one if you are not.

An emphathetic listener is hard to come across.When anyone is talking we crave to become centre of attention continuously either by poking our views into the conversation, or by reacting internally or by paying no heed and attention to what is being said. So even while listening, listener wants to grab attention.

BUT one must realise always that silence is more potent than speech.The best listener will be most influential as there is no loss of energy in interaction, thus stress is all kicked off. To listen quietly attentively, without being a judge yourself or interpreter or poking your nose every now and then - you show your respect to the speaker and it also marks hospitability.

Mind you , attentive listening also conveys to you the feelings attached and conveyed through the words which are spoken..So instead of parts, you take in the whole of the spoken ideas.

But how to become an emphathetic listener - value other more than yourself - as listening is all about mindfulness, a genuine interest in other person and the esteem respect you give to him/her. It thus leaves you free from all sort of distractions - thereby enabling you to get whole of message in the speech.
Secondly you need to learn to be patient, you need to listen as if you are listening to something you had never listened before - no condemnation , no acceptance. Slow your thinking process, let curiosity crave in and the approach be a simple one. It may I think at some point of time become an outlet to devotion (something spiritual). It , I feel will make you more effective communicator yourself.

There is one more reason to become an emphathetic listener. Self sufficiency and success dominate the idealogy of world today and failure is all nothing but trashed ruthlessly.This listening will heal and help the despair. It would help them to regain their intrinsic worth and their right to exist. Such a person to whom no one listens becomes depressed and desperate, he/she gets broken and develops low self-esteem.There begins suffering and pain which is suffocating and killing.This demoralised, dejected person now starts vomitting his heart to strangers, and -- relatives, nearones are just cause for agony to him.You lose the will and hope to survive and live . So effective listening can provide one with much needed healing touch.

In other words you can grade it as one of the ways to serve the needy and service to God.

O God help me to become an emphathetic listener for my good and for my friends good.

1 comment:

Jagadish said...

hmm.. well explained :)